


stole the only girl i loved, and drowned her deep inside of me

by devereauxed



Series: 25 Kisses [6]
Category: Jane the Virgin (TV)
Genre: A LOT of Angst, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Drunk kiss, F/F, Pre-Canon, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-24
Updated: 2017-04-24
Packaged: 2018-10-23 09:34:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10716786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/devereauxed/pseuds/devereauxed
Summary: With Emilio out of town, Rose is struggling not to call Luisa, something that is made infinitely harder when Luisa is found in the hotel bar.





	stole the only girl i loved, and drowned her deep inside of me

**Author's Note:**

> Well, here's drunk kiss. 
> 
> It's about as happy as you would imagine a drunk Luisa kiss would be. 
> 
> Comments are appreciated, I'm super unsure about this one.

Rose sighed as she pulled up to the valet in front of the Marbella. Emilio had left for New York that morning without her, something that would normally make her very happy, but as soon as he’d walked out the door all she could think of was calling Luisa. She’d spent the day fighting that urge every way she knew, and despite the fact that she had managed to take care of more business in the last eight hours than in the last month, all she was left with at the end of the day was a migraine and a simmering need in the pit of her stomach. Every time she had found herself reaching for her phone she reminded herself of the look of pain and anger on Luisa’s face the last time she’d seen her, as she had turned and stormed out of the suite, slamming the door violently behind her.

She had finally made a clean break. She couldn’t call Luisa.

She stepped out of the car and handed her keys to the valet before making her way inside the hotel. She kept her head down, hoping to make it upstairs without incident, but she could tell that Robert, the concierge, locked onto her purposefully as soon as she stepped inside. Normally she would have pretended not to see him, but the panic in his eyes made her pause.

As she made her way to the front desk, he looked up at her nervously.

“I’m so sorry to bother you, Mrs. Solano, but we haven’t been able to get ahold of Mr. Solano,” he began.  
  
“He’s out of town, is there a problem?” she asked.

“Um, well,” he hesitated, looking toward the bar. “He left word with us that we should notify him if-“

He trailed off as a raucous laugh rang out from the bar. Rose’s heart sank. She knew that laugh, and it was just a little too loud.

“Luisa,” she said with a sigh, and the concierge nodded awkwardly. “How long has she been there?”

“It’s been almost two hours now,” he told her.

Rose closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath.

“Thank you, Robert,” she said. “I’ll take care of it.”

She walked into the bar, immediately spotting Luisa, half-slumped on the bar and doing her best to get the uncomfortable looking businesswoman next to her do a shot with her. 

Rose locked eyes with the bartender as she made her way across the room, allowing her gaze to take on the cold, cruel edge she normally reserved for drug lords and henchmen. The girl dropped the glass she was wiping down, and the redhead felt a satisfied thrill shoot through her. She was going to fire that girl and she was going to enjoy it.  

“Party foul!” Luisa yelled. “Everyone has to do a shot!”

Rose placed her hand gently on the brunette’s elbow, and Luisa spun to look at her.  She saw something undecipherable flash through her eyes, but in a blink it was gone and she threw her arms out cheerfully.

“Rose!” Luisa exclaimed. “Hi!”

Luisa’s face was flushed and her eyes were unfocused.

Rose wrapped a hand tightly around her wrist. “Luisa, what are you doing?” she asked quietly.

“No, I was just waiting for a table, you know, for dinner and it’s busy,” she slurred, waving a hand carelessly and swaying slightly on the bar stool.  

Rose said nothing but looked at her with eyes full of concern and disappointment, and Luisa wilted, her face crumpling in shame. 

“Can you get me out of here?” the brunette asked, her voice so low that Rose almost couldn’t hear her.

Rose slid her hand into Luisa’s without another thought, taking some of her weight so she wouldn’t stumble as they made their way out of the bar.

“Can you take me home?” Luisa asked, not looking at her. 

Rose considered Luisa’s profile for a moment before she firmly guided Luisa into the elevator. “No.”

Luisa scoffed as she staggered into the wall. “Are you serious?” 

“You can’t be alone right now,” the redhead replied.

“And being with you is better?” Luisa said, her eyes flashing with anger.

Rose square her shoulders, refusing to take the bait. “Than you alone with a bottle of vodka? Yes.”

The brunette rolled her eyes and crossed her arms petulantly. Rose sighed and looked up, choosing to focus her attention on the flashing numbers above them as the elevator rose, but taking her eyes off of Luisa was a mistake. Before she knew it Luisa had her pressed against the wall, one hand moving into her hair and the other sliding her dress up her leg.

“I know what you want,” Luisa said, the look in her eyes predatory even as her words were still slurred. 

Then Luisa’s mouth was on hers, hard and insistent. Drunk or not, being near the brunette aroused her, and Rose melted into her touch, moaning in surprise as warmth pooled low in her stomach. Luisa pulled back with an arrogant smile that didn’t reach her eyes and it snapped Rose out of her haze. She pushed Luisa back, breathing heavily. 

“Luisa, no,” she gasped, placing a hand against the brunette’s chest to keep them apart.

Luisa’s eyes flickered with hurt and embarrassment, and she turned away, leaning heavily on the wall.

When the doors opened Rose waited until Luisa stumbled out ahead of her, and trailed after her toward she and Emilio’s suite. Rose reached around her and unlocked the door, catching Luisa’s arm as she tripped across the threshold. She tried to guide Luisa to the couch, but the brunette wrenched her arm from Rose’s grasp, stomped to the furthest chair, and collapsed into it.

The redhead sighed and moved to sit down on the couch, giving Luisa space but not daring to leave her alone, knowing she would likely take the earliest opportunity to flee.

After ten minutes of tense, angry silence, Rose’s patience ran out.

“What happened?” she asked, doing her best not sound angry.  

Luisa scoffed and didn’t answer.

“Lu…” she pressed and the brunette flashed her a cold look. Rose looked down, knowing the term of endearment wasn’t helping or appreciated. They lapsed back into an uncomfortable silence, and the redhead focused her attention on her hands, trying to get her feelings under control. She was worried about Luisa, but being near her, kissing her, feeling the warmth of her body against her, unleashed a unique blend of attraction, adoration, and panic that only Luisa could provoke.

“He left this morning.”

Luisa’s voice broke the silence sharply and Rose’s head snapped up to look at her. Luisa was looking back at her with hazy eyes, undeniably drunk but determined nonetheless.   

“He did,” Rose said simply, not bothering to pretend she didn’t know who Luisa was talking about. 

“You didn’t call,” Luisa said in a small, slurred voice, and Rose’s stomach dropped.

“No. I didn’t,” she responded, doing her best to keep her voice calm and detached. Luisa looked away, trying to hide the fact that her eyes had filled with tears. It frustrated Rose that her first instinct was to comfort her, to take it all back, to cross the room and kiss her until crying was the last thing on her mind. She needed to keep Luisa at arm’s length, to maintain that space, and it had been proven time and again that she couldn’t trust herself when it came to the woman sitting across from her. So she said nothing, even if it left her feeling hollow.

The silence that stretched between them felt endless. Under normal circumstances Luisa was all movement, her hands gesturing wildly as she chattered or tapping her feet restlessly. Even when she was stationary energy seemingly radiated from her, but now she was utterly still. There was nothing about Luisa in that moment that felt like Luisa.

Rose nearly gave in, opening her mouth to say something, anything, to bring Luisa back to her, when the brunette tipped forward and put her head in her hands.

“Fuck,” she muttered. “I’m going to be sick.”

Before the redhead could react Luisa had pressed a hand to her mouth and fled to the bathroom, weaving slightly. Rose fought the urge to follow, and slumped backward, resting her head against the couch and staring at the ceiling. She knew that she had been a factor in this relapse, if not the sole reason for it. There was a sick, twisting feeling in the pit of her stomach that she couldn’t quite place, but some part of her knew that it had to be guilt. 

When Luisa hadn’t returned ten minutes later, Rose grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen and made her way to the bathroom, knocking lightly and calling Luisa’s name. There was no answer, so she pushed the door open carefully.

Luisa was leaning against the wall, her knees pulled up to her chest. She had her face buried in her arms, but looked up when Rose entered the bathroom. There were tears streaming down her face.

“Oh, Lu,” Rose breathed as she knelt beside her, setting the glass down beside her.

“Why?” Luisa asked plaintively.

“Why what?” she responded, softly.

“Why am I not important enough for anyone to stay?”

Rose’s heart sank and she dug her nails into her palms.

“Please tell me,” Luisa begged. “Tell me so I can change. I can fix it. Please, Rose.”

All Rose could do was place a hand on Luisa’s cheek gently and the brunette leaned into it.

“You don’t need to be fixed, Luisa,” she said quietly.

“Don’t I?” 

Rose had so much she wanted to say, but she stopped herself. She couldn’t. She met Luisa’s eye, putting as much as possible into a look. Luisa stared at her blearily, hiccupping slightly as tried to catch her breath.

Rose wordlessly handed her the glass of water, watching as the brunette took several slow slips. Once Luisa’s breathing evened out, Rose stood and gently pulled her to her feet. She handed Luisa a toothbrush, leaning against the doorframe and waiting for the brunette to brush her teeth to get the taste out of her mouth. Luisa still wasn’t steady on her feet and Rose took her hand, leading her to bed, but Luisa pulled her hand away when she realized where she was being taken.

“Rose…no,” she said.

“Just to sleep, Lu. You need to sleep,” Rose replied. Luisa sighed and kicked off her shoes as Rose pulled down the blankets for her. She sank to the bed and curled into a ball, allowing the redhead to cover her gently.

“Stay?” she asked in a small voice. 

Rose hesitated. There was always something that got past her defenses, that got her to break her rules, and she had a sinking feeling that this was it. Luisa’s wide eyes met hers pleadingly and she nodded tersely, flicking off the light before lying down beside her on top of the covers.

Luisa didn’t reach for her and Rose managed to stop herself from taking the brunette’s hand again, but below the blanket she felt Luisa move her foot just enough so that it was touching her leg. It was nothing, but it was all they had now.

She watched the minutes pass on the clock beside the bed. After nearly an hour of listening to Luisa breathe next to her, she sighed. Now that Luisa was asleep she figured she was allowed a moment of weakness and reached out to run her hand through Luisa’s hair before trailing her fingers gently down her arm and tangling their fingers together.

“It’s not you, Lu,” she whispered to the sleeping woman beside her. “You aren’t the reason I can’t be with you. It’s so much more complicated than that. It’s not…your father….I need him.” 

“I need _you_ ,” came a soft reply from beside her and Rose’s breath caught in her throat.

“I thought you were asleep,” she said.

“I was,” Luisa answered.

Rose didn’t answer, but she didn’t pull her hand away either.   

“I hope I remember this in the morning,” the brunette said, her voice rough with sleep and sadness.

“I don’t,” Rose said under her breath.

“I know,” Luisa replied softly. 

Rose sighed and squeezed Luisa’s hand. Luisa squeezed back. 

“Sleep,” Rose said.

It wasn’t long before she heard Luisa’s breathing even out again, and she let herself drift off too, focused only on the feel of Luisa’s hand in hers and the warmth of her leg pressed against her through the blanket.

* * *

When Rose woke early the next morning, the room was a hazy purple. As she moved to sit up she realized that in the night Luisa had moved closer, tucked her head under Rose’s chin, and thrown an arm across her waist, tightly gripping her side. She permitted herself to have just a moment before she had to shove all of her feelings to the back of her mind and withdraw from Luisa, leaving her to pick up the pieces of her relapse alone.

She moved her hand to Luisa’s back, running her fingers softly across the skin peeking out over the top of her dress, and leaned her head down to bury her face in Luisa’s hair, inhaling the mango scent of her shampoo and a hundred other little things that added up to Luisa.

Her body filled with warmth and dread at the same time and she took a deep breath to calm her pounding heart. She felt Luisa stir slightly and moved to disentangle herself from the sleeping brunette. The hand gripping her side tightened further, refusing to let go, and Rose gently but firmly removed it and slid from the bed. The brunette snuggled her face into Rose’s pillow, evidently finding some source of comfort there because she smiled slightly and slept on.  

Rose took in the sight of Luisa asleep in the bed she shared with Emilio, and a wave of something close to shame washed over her, which she was wholly unprepared for. She didn’t love Emilio and was unconcerned with being faithful to him - she’d slept with Luisa countless times since they'd married, many of them in this very bed - but there was an intimacy to this that made it different. She didn’t feel unfaithful to her husband, she felt unfaithful to Luisa. The realization hit her hard enough to take her breath away.

She stumbled to the bathroom to splash cold water on her face and leaned heavily against the counter. 

 _Get it together,_ she thought to herself, harshly. _She is not as important as the plan, she is not the endgame_. But even as she thought it, she knew she was lying to herself.

She threw her shoulders back and ran her fingers through her hair, making eye contact with herself in the mirror. She could see the weakness in her eyes and felt anger rise within her. She slammed her hand to the counter before turning on the shower, stripping off yesterday’s dress and stepping into the scalding spray.

She washed her hair and scrubbed at her skin vigorously, needing to rid herself of everything she was feeling. As caught up as she was in her own thoughts, she didn’t notice that Luisa had stepped into the shower behind her until she felt a rush of cold air quickly replaced by the warmth of Luisa pressed against her back. She wanted to fight it, to push her away, but the feel of Luisa’s skin against her own mixed with the events of the last twelve hours was too much.

She arched her back and tilted her head, offering her neck to the woman behind her, and Luisa wasted no time placing long, sucking kisses up and down the pale skin. Luisa slid her hands slowly across Rose’s hips before grasping them tightly and pulling her roughly back against her. She moved her hands to Rose’s chest, flicking her nipples quickly and Rose moaned loudly, the sound echoing throughout the shower.

The brunette nipped at her shoulder before abruptly spinning Rose around and slamming her back to the wall of the shower with a hand on her chest. Rose expected Luisa’s lips on hers, but the brunette dropped to her knees and pulled Rose’s leg over her shoulder. There was no teasing or tenderness, Luisa immediately began flicking her tongue quickly across Rose’s clit. There was an urgency to her movements, as though she was driven only by the need to make the redhead come hard and quickly.

Rose slammed her head back against the wall, moaning. She tangled one hand in Luisa’s hair as the brunette dug her nails into Rose’s leg and slid her tongue inside of her, roughly fucking her with it. Rose was shouting herself hoarse, her orgasm building faster than she could ever remember happening before. Luisa nipped at Rose’s clit and she yelped, but Luisa soothed it with her tongue before sucking it into her mouth and repeatedly flicking it with her tongue.

Rose came with a shout and her knees nearly gave out, but Luisa was on her feet again in an instant, spinning her back around to face the wall. She grabbed the redhead’s wrists and placed her hands against the wall, the forceful squeeze she gave each of them before pulling away made it clear that she was not to move them. Before Rose could catch her breath Luisa had her bent forward and was sliding two fingers into her from behind. Rose threw her head back and moaned something that sounded vaguely like Luisa’s name, panting as Luisa began earnestly fucking her again.

Luisa slid one hand around Rose’s body and grasped at her breast, kneading it roughly, as she leaned forward and placed a nipping kiss on the redhead’s shoulder before sucking hard. Rose knew she had intentionally left a mark, breaking one of the unspoken rules of their arrangement. There was a possessiveness in it that thrilled Rose, though she would never admit it, and her moans took on a frantic edge. She pressed her forehead to the tile and scratched fruitlessly against it as her whole body began to tighten. 

The brunette pulled her fingers out and slid her hand around Rose’s waist to press rough circles across her clit. She slid one hand up to Rose’s hair, running her fingers through it before wrapping it around her hand and pulling roughly. Rose’s head snapped back and she gasped in pleasure and pain. Luisa redoubled her efforts, pressing her face into Rose’s neck, breathing roughly into her ear.

Rose was incoherent. All she could do was pant and moan, she was desperate and entirely at Luisa’s mercy. The brunette relentlessly pushed her toward orgasm, keeping a tight hold on her hair. Rose’s body arched more and more until she was strung taut. With one last rough tug on her hair, Rose broke, screaming her release. She collapsed forward, pressing herself to the wall, trying to catch her breath.   

As she moved to turn and look at Luisa, the brunette put a hand on either side of her, stopping her movements. She leaned in, nipping lightly at Rose’s ear, before whispering hotly, “I remember.”

Before Rose could react, Luisa was gone.  


End file.
